The Perp Diaries

PSB

Maximum Pace
Oct 26, 2014
113
66
58
Tokyo
#1
How about a statistical analysis of the perps?

(a) 80 year old guy driving a white keijidosha van with dents all over - double points if the licence plate is Tokorozawa or Kasukabe
(b) 60 year old women in a brand new SUV - double points for BMW, Volvo, VW or Porsche with Setagaya plates - triple points if she deliberately avoids eye-contact
(c) 70 year old taxi driver
(d) Alphard or similar with Yokohama plates, driven by a twenty-something - double points if there is a sticker on the rear saying Hawaii, Surf or similar
(e) 30-something mother in a small Nissan or Toyota with kids in the front seat - double points if the car model name is stupid like Nissan Knob

That just about sums up my month so far.....
 

bawbag

Maximum Pace
Mar 20, 2013
430
244
63
Tokyo
#2
How about a statistical analysis of the perps?

(a) 80 year old guy driving a white keijidosha van with dents all over - double points if the licence plate is Tokorozawa or Kasukabe
(b) 60 year old women in a brand new SUV - double points for BMW, Volvo, VW or Porsche with Setagaya plates - triple points if she deliberately avoids eye-contact
(c) 70 year old taxi driver
(d) Alphard or similar with Yokohama plates, driven by a twenty-something - double points if there is a sticker on the rear saying Hawaii, Surf or similar
(e) 30-something mother in a small Nissan or Toyota with kids in the front seat - double points if the car model name is stupid like Nissan Knob

That just about sums up my month so far.....
(f) left-hand drive driven by anyone. Bonus points if the driver is wearing a silk shirt.
(g) Prius drivers.
 
Likes: PSB

Heath

Maximum Pace
Dec 13, 2014
525
452
93
47
Kamagaya
www.nanairogakudo.com
#3
(m) Middle-aged female office worker in uniform who pulls out from a side road 5 meters in front of you and your mate early on a Sunday morning on a completely unused road after eyeing you off for 5 seconds before making a decision to pull out.
So close to you that she forces you across the road into potential oncoming traffic (luckily there's none).
And, having had her window fully down, cops some clear abuse in English that any Japanese would be able to understand straight in her face.
Starts to give you a death stare and is shocked to be confronted with blue eyes locked on for war.
Immediately breaks eye contact and focusses straight ahead for the next 30m whilst continuing to cop it verbally before driving off.

It doesn't matter what country I'm in, no one does that to me and gets away with it!
If I get deported then that's all good.
I have a family to return home to.
Fair's fair.
 

PSB

Maximum Pace
Oct 26, 2014
113
66
58
Tokyo
#4
(h) 90 year old guy driving a small white van along a completely deserted countryside rice field road who slams on his brakes for literally no apparent reason as hard as he fucking well can while you are approaching from behind.
(h) and (a) might be the same guy. Was he 4 foot 10 and wearing a cap with the name of an imaginary US air squadron?
 
Likes: D'Pioneer

baribari

Maximum Pace
May 28, 2010
490
113
63
Fukushima
#5
Guys in their 60s and 70s driving one of those off-white high-end (relatively speaking) Toyota or Nissan sedans from the 90s.

(Had a guy like that try to turn into me when I had the right of way at a light that had just turned green yesterday. Seriously, wtf, dude?)
 

bawbag

Maximum Pace
Mar 20, 2013
430
244
63
Tokyo
#7
Managed to get a cathartic "USE YOUR F*****G EYES YOU P****K" unloaded on a guy driving a silver Merc near Tokyo Dome. He was in the middle lane, I in the left, cycling at the same pace he was driving exactly alongside the passenger door so in full view. No signalling, he just decided to change lanes. He got halfway into the transition when I gave him a full on "OY." No dice; he forced me to grab a fistful of brake so he wouldn't plough me off the road. Caught up to him at the lights and said the aforementioned. As you can imagine, it was like I didn't exist. Eyes locked forward with the most passive expression plastered to his face.

I've found that the best course of action just to freak them out is to get in front of them and take my phone out, aim the camera at their license plate and then their face and pretend to take photos; their fear is palpable. Couldn't do it this time as I was in a rush. Don't do this in Osaka unless you want to be mangled.
 
May 22, 2007
3,608
1,440
143
Kawasaki
halffastcycling.com
#9
I think drivers here are on the whole better-mannered - certainly towards cyclists - than in any other country I have been to. Perhaps this is what makes the small proportion of dickheads stand out so much. Nevertheless, the best survival strategy is to assume that everyone on the road (or sidewalk) is a complete moron.

Here's a collection of accidents in Japan captured by dashboard cameras. Hindsight is 20:20, of course. But see how many you can spot in the moments before they happen. Some - especially those involving bikes - were painful for me to watch. We are so vulnerable.


What saddens me most is that drivers don't stop and help. Too-busy-too-busy, SEP.
 

Heath

Maximum Pace
Dec 13, 2014
525
452
93
47
Kamagaya
www.nanairogakudo.com
#13
Cycling is great for stress #OutsideIsDeath
^ I had to have a little chuckle at that because that is basically every ride for me.

Daft, brain dead, and just generally lacking any concern for the existence of others sums up the average person on the move here.

It is definitely a different mindset. A major reason why I ride on abandoned country roads whenever I can.
 

wexford

Maximum Pace
Jul 3, 2012
1,030
624
133
Tokyo
#16
Truth is that the perps have started using TCC and strava as that gives them the upper hand. Ride maps, schedules, usual routes. Tis all there. Perp heaven.
 

GrantT

Maximum Pace
Oct 2, 2012
1,617
1,195
143
Setagaya
#17
There are a few Koyama Driving Schools around my way in Setagaya and they send out minibuses like the one below to collect students from train stations. Ironically, these green minibuses have the worst drivers of the lot, and consistently run red lights and make no space for cyclists when they overtake. What a joke.
 

leicaman

Maximum Pace
Sep 20, 2012
2,537
2,221
133
Asakadai, Saitama
#18
There are a few Koyama Driving Schools around my way in Setagaya and they send out minibuses like the one below to collect students from train stations. Ironically, these green minibuses have the worst drivers of the lot, and consistently run red lights and make no space for cyclists when they overtake. What a joke.
View attachment 13620
Sounds like you need to capture them on film in the act like last time. A quick email to head office with a link to YouTube will most probably get a few people told off.
 

luka

Maximum Pace
Jan 13, 2015
908
451
93
#20
This morning, Mr open the door, get half way out and THEN look back:


This bike almost hit the cabby, who was chilling behind his stopped car only to suddenly decide he wants back in, but couldn't be bothered looking. Kept proper distance so I was OK but the rear part of the bike levitated for a sec there:

 
Likes: Heath